High of 43*. Independence is very much in vogue. Proudly walks into my room post-bath, having been instructed to dress himself:
“How do I look, Mom??”
And then proceeds to play outside with the neighbor kids wearing his unicorn-print-patterned winter jacket similarly unzipped from mid-afternoon till dinnertime.
Related: clearly they’re related // unspoken arrangements mean no matter what our kids wear, it will never require more than a machine wash & dry
A few weeks ago, a friend invited me out to a Friday lunch. While we’ve known each other for the better part of a decade, our interactions have been largely centered around the goings-on of our first-born children who formed a fast and easy friendship during daycare. We sit by each other so we can tag-team scolding our sons for being noisy at the movies. We know each other’s in-laws because of how many backyard birthday parties we’ve attended. We have photos on our phones of our children as toddlers with their baby-teeth grins, and now at their Rec & Ed basketball practices.
So when she invited me out for an exceptionally rare 1:1 date, I blocked my calendar, thinking perhaps she had something to tell me.
Instead, we said our hellos, ordered a couple of Cokes, and she clumsily began:
“I don’t know how to start this without being kind of awkward, so I’m just going to start it. They always say, ‘check on your strong friends.’ I know we don’t talk that much about ourselves, but you are among the strongest women I know, so I just… I just wanted to check in on you.”
An open invitation to voice whatever may be troubling you, without sacrificing your sense of keeping it together?? How amazing is this?!
Filing this away in the “friendship pro tip” mental folder for use at a future date.
Related: the six forces that fuel friendship // when your friends arrange a reality-TV-worthy double date
“How do you celebrate Valentine’s Day?” a new friend asked me recently. We traded rituals and I silently celebrated finding a kindred spirit when she confessed she too never woke up early to make pink pancakes or cut her kids’ sandwiches into heart shapes. Further, our resident Elves on Shelves also strictly move from tree to mantle and back again (we made a mental note to have our boys hang out more next December so they don’t accrue higher expectations from friends with more creative parents).
No, for my kids, I do some sweets and simple cards (this year homemade as I couldn’t justify $12 in cards when 3/4 of my kids are not yet literate).
But one tradition I do stand by, particularly for those of us celebrating with someone decidedly difficult to buy for, is the “Day of Dave.” For almost 15 years now, I have “gifted” Dave the promise of one day that is specifically about what he wants to do. On these days, we may eat an enormous batch of homemade crepes for breakfast. We may finally watch the show he’s convinced I would like if I just gave it a chance (and I then save my honest reviews for the following morning). We may visit Costco to purchase our first “big kid” TV after our first years as newlyweds with a big, boxy, low resolution hand-me-down and its faulty remote. We may bring our kids to celebrate (2021), or we may develop better judgment and leave them at home (2022).
For any of you looking for last-minute gifts for your significant other (romantic or otherwise!), it’s not too late to gift them a day of choose-your-own-indulgence. You heard it here first.
Related: another love hack: when a lousy roommate might save your marriage // overheard: things I need to communicate to my husband
- Someone documented my dad’s mental flow chart with respect to the thermostat during winter months.
- Gen Z speak. Didn’t expect to watch the entirety of this bit, and yet… learned a lot. Periodt.
- How amazing (& harrowing) is this sailing event?? Track the race live here.
- Google translate “how to pronounce” – from written to verbal, including live practice!
PS for those of you who have kindly checked in on us subsequent to this week’s stomach bug, we seem to have held the line at 4/6. Morale remained relatively high despite some tough love.
Me: J, I’m going to set up O in my bathroom for the afternoon. If you feel anything from your stomach, please head to the bathroom right away.
J: okay, Mom. But it’s okay if I don’t make it to the potty, right?
Me, having just changed over the 9th load of laundry that single day: …no, Honey, it’s really not anymore.
Will we deplete our bleach supply before the day is over?? Will Mom survive to take care of everyone just long enough to then spend the weekend with her head in a toilet?? Will we ever be brave enough to have the boys rest on soft seating again?!
Stay tuned.
Related: at least I didn’t leave the laundry outside overnight this time? // many things that may happen before 9am.
You’ll never hear strings of expletives before 7:03am quite like the ones muttered from our kitchen counter as Dave & I race the many other parents enrolling their children in limited-capacity summer camp programs on the frigid February morning registration opens promptly at 7.
We entered at least one of our sons’ birthday wrong, accidentally dual-enrolled another, and may have to walk back a few key terms they collectively heard over their morning toast… but summer 2023, we are (partially – at least, on the weeks we’re not wait-listed) ready for you!
Related: 6am fail // last year’s summer camp – a resounding success.
